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Have you been through a breakup?


Have you retired or changed jobs?


Have you been in an abusive relationship?


Have you moved, lost a pet, or lost enven the lost of your faith?


Those are a few of the 30+ losses you might experience that cause grief.


What is Grief?


Simply defined, grief is the normal and natural reaction to significant emotional loss of any kind. While we never compare losses, any list would include death and divorce as obvious painful losses. There are 43 losses that can produce the range of emotions. Some on the list include retirement, moving, pet loss, financial and health issues, etc.


The range of emotions associated with grief is as varied as there are people and personalities. There is no list of feelings that would adequately describe one person’s emotions, much less an entire society.


Grief is individual and unique. As every relationship is unique, so are the feelings and thoughts each person will have about the relationship that has been altered by death, divorce or for other reasons.



The problem


While grief is normal and natural, most of the information passed on within our culture about dealing with grief is not normal, natural or helpful. Grief is the emotional response to loss, but most of the information we have learned about dealing with loss is intellectual.


The majority of incorrect ideas about dealing with loss can be summed up in six myths which are so common that nearly everyone recognizes them. Most people have never questioned whether or not they are valid. The misinformation is best described in the following:

Myths about Grief...

These represents the most commom incorrect ideas when dealing with grief:


  • Don't feel bad

  • Replace the loss

  • Grieve alone

  • Be strong

  • Keep busy

  • Time heals all wounds

Just looking at the myth that  “Time Heals” creates the idea that a person just has to wait and they will feel better. Some people have waited 10, 20, 30, and 40 years and still didn’t feel better. And, we know that they would tell you that not only had time not healed them, but that it had also compounded the pain.


The other five myths carry equally unhelpful messages.

No one can can advise you when to stop feeling the way you do, only you know when it is time to move forward....